4 Signs You Might Have Low Self-Esteem

Have you wondered if you have low self-esteem? Low self-esteem in women is actually quite common, unfortunately. As women, we experience more abuse and traumatic events than men, and also experience discrimination in overt and covert ways. Discrimination and maltreatment can begin in childhood, and can be covert verbal and non-verbal messages we receive from others, or overt expressions of discrimination and abuse. Either way, it is not uncommon for women to have low self-esteem. Identifying and learning how to improve your self-esteem can greatly impact emotional health. Increasing your self-esteem can help you feel more confident, calm, and satisfied. We tend to make healthier decisions that are in line with our values when we have a healthy amount of self-esteem. Are you wondering if you have low self-esteem? Here are some signs that you might have low self-esteem:

  1. Persistent negative self-talk

    When we have low self-esteem, it is common to have persistent negative self-talk. You might notice judging and criticizing thoughts about yourself. You also might notice yourself calling yourself mean names or just saying hateful things to yourself. If you do have persistent negative self talk it’s important to work on talking to yourself in healthier ways. Start a daily affirmation practice, and use a stop signal to stop negative thoughts in their tracks, and then re-frame them with healthier thoughts.

    Here’s a helpful blog post I wrote on how to stop letting negative thoughts control you.

  2. Passivity

    When we don’t value ourselves, we tend to act and be passive when relating and communicating with others. If we don’t believe in our value and worth, then we certainly don’t present ourselves as equals with others. The way to change passivity into assertiveness is to really start to know and believe in your value and worth. Changing your self-talk will help, but it will also help to try out assertive behavior with others. Check out this blog post on assertiveness skills to learn more.

  3. Needing approval from others

    Another sign of low self-esteem is needing approval from others. Its normal to ask for help or feedback from loved ones from time to time. However, if you find yourself constantly doubting yourself and having to look to others to help you feel confident or good enough, then this could be unhealthy. When we depend on others to make ourselves feel good about ourselves, this almost always ends in disappointment. We need to learn to validate and affirm ourselves. Practicing self-love is a helpful way to start this process. Here’s a blog post I wrote on self-love.

  4. Depression and anxiety

    Low self-esteem, especially when it is severe can lead to depression and anxiety. If we consistently feel negatively about ourselves, or are constantly concerned if other’s approve of us, the result is symptoms of anxiety and depression. If you are experiencing anxiety or depression as a result of low self-esteem, seeing a therapist like myself would be very helpful.

I hope this blog post is helpful in determining if you might have low self-esteem. There are many ways you can increase your self-esteem as I’ve outlined above, it all starts with the first step!

Have a great day and reach out anytime!